Renew

I sludged through
Each day dreaming of you
Of life inside the dream
Of life that is more than just bearable

But we're here
You, my education
My dream coming true
The one thing that I can do with my eyes shut

And I won't do it
I wait and sludge through
Trying to make the time pass
Even though this IS the geener grass
This is my other side of the fence

What must I do to be saved.

Raise It

I don't want to do what must be done.
A childishness-
Feelings of futility that tear down
All I've worked for
Ten weeks destroyed in ten days

If this temple has been torn down
Raise it again in three days

Done

Fighting words
Fixing you
Stretching for the light
Almost free
Almost free

If I could just leave

New / Old

Silvery
Worn
Full
Something about you
Mesmerizes me
Pulls me toward you

I want to reach out
I want to find you
On the other end of my fingertips

Passing

It takes me reading the words
Entering into the story
Walking through Narnia's wardrobe
To know that you're gone

Is this door an entrance or and exit?
Are these words taking me home
Or farther away from home
Do they bring you closer
Or push you farther

Away, you passed
These words take me there

Storytelling

In my story
I'm not afraid

Every single day

Whether I have it all
or have nothing

I'm not afraid

Screen

I tore a hole
In the screen
Walked through
Jumped through
Touched you

Intermediate

I looked at your face
It's covered in mud
Filth
Where you are unseen
And everything is extraordinary
But Jesus put mud
And spit
Into a man's eyes one day
And afterward he washed
and was made whole again

Tragedy

such a broken mess
we don't want any more than this
we don't want any less
we're never no
we're never fully yes

and your love opens old wounds
like paper slices open skin

Trees

All this new life hovering over me
A protective canopy
The Spring trees are in bloom

Scarves

Freedom
Her brown, patterned scarf
Indiscriminate
Covered
Among us

Her skin
Holding her bones in
Keeping us out

Crowded

You're a crowded cave
There's nothing right between us
Why am I waiting

Flowing

I don't own any poetry
For these
Anymore

No longer
Do I pull apart their ribs
And climb into their heart

The best of me
Flowed freely
Mixed with too much rain
Washed down the mountain

Now both of us are clean
But so far away

A Safe Place to Stand

A void behind me
Blurring the past
Until it's senseless
A void everywhere ahead
An indiscernible future
The only safe place
Is a mathematician's quiet office
An old book on problem solving
A familiar place to drink coffee
Old towels and jeans
The here and now collapses
and falls into the void
Like lungs that cannot sustain breath
Each moment races past me like this
There are hazards everywhere
There is void on every side
I strain against the blurriness of it
Against the ambiguity
I struggle for a safe place to stand
And there is none
This is my Lent

Self-Indulgence

Self-indulgence
A little sleep
Driving the opposite direction
When you know
Where you should be
And who

Held

A strange calming peace
Like a hand against the door
Keeping this life safe

Misconstrued

These new words
Are afterthoughts
You didn't think them
While the picture was being taken

It wasn't until later
That it seemed like
Something
You should have felt

I was there
It was more like irritation
Than love
Or than fondness
You should have smiled less
Because now you don't remember
How bothersome it all was

We Are Bending

This room I've established as my own
Unthinkingly shaped into my soul's target
Bullseye
Unfortunate
That pile of laundry has taken over

Learning

I go

Not to teach
What God has said
To the generation before me

But to learn
What he is saying
To us

Similar

That homeless man
Sitting on the short wall
Paused in reflection
Looks a lot like my dad looks
When his mind has wandered
And he's looking off into the distance
Hands holding onto the bowl

Like I will look in a few years